…would so much love to write something new but, in retrospect, what was said last year still seems new.

For the camaraderie of friendship (did someone say, virtual?) thank you, is said, for the opportunity to share thots and words.

As the year ebbs to its close and another year prepares to slip in; let’s remember to always see the glass as half full.

Thus, dusk is near but, more importantly, a new dawn beacons and through it all what can we say save Thank You Lord for been our help in ages past and our hope and assurance for years to come.

Word for word, thot for thot she is a match. She understands that the pen is much mightier than the sword; and challenges anyone who thinks ‘actions speak louder than words’ because, ‘tis words that gives character to action. She is discreet, she’s engaging. Oh, yeah engaging, she’ll make you gasps for more. Like Oliver, I know not; why not wait till you meet. She is captivating both in words and looks? Looks? …guess you would want to challenge that. Afterall, opinions are personal you’d repeat to me. But, trust me even if only this once and you probably will never doubt me again. Oh, don’t even think that route; she ain’t a goddess. Goddesses are beyond human comprehension, they are myths. Illusions.

She wants a house filled with love, yeah that is her definition of a home and compact that would be easy to clean. The house should also have a garden with trees and a hammock where she can lie in the evenings to read. Of course, the hammock will serve multiple purposes to include snuggling with her hubby. Like a quiver full of arrows, the children of one’s youth are likened. Surely, she want children too; a set of twins they better be identical, if not, the essence would almost be lost and an adopted one. Don’t ask, “Why an adopted one?” That is her person.

She has natural long flowing hair, which she normally lets down. She does not seem to follow the trends in vogue, yet, she is classy; …only one can describe a dress as; “It’s a short purple dress…with a brown belt and shoes”. I did not say royal purple is her favorite colour, ‘tis actually pink and black.

Of course, for what she wants, she will wager the right words. Trust me she can also be a spendthrift though, she wants to start saving more.

I think she is inquisitive but, you probably won’t know ‘cos she knows how to bid her time. Don’t be caught off-guard she is extremely observant. She is trusting and for some reason I am tempted to say adventurous also only, ‘m not sure she would be willing to dare the Mount Everest.

So, do you have a picture of her in your ‘minds I’? Oh, did I mention that she’s cute? Well, she is. ……..do you know her?

Again? What? You are simply a rebel. Haba, at least file the charges against me and allow me to plead ‘not guilty’ or ‘innocent’. What did your boss tell you last end of year party? That I was simply a rebel, which we both know isn’t exactly true. Why did he say that? We were supposed to wear a touch of green, but, unfortunately try as much as I could I didn’t find anything in my wardrobe with even a stain of green. Although sha, much after the party I realised I could have just bought a green silk knots and used with a white shirts.

 

So, why didn’t you get a red one this time? At least you know I honestly don’t have anything red. Hey before you start thinking of excuses, we know your wardrobe is filled with blues and white but so don’t give us that line. It won’t be accepted. Funny enough, I accept ‘some’ fault because I actually planned on changing the threading of the button-hole of one of my shirts to red. Procrastination…. Fair enough at least you had the thots.  But, why did you say ‘some’ fault? Oh, because I wore a red hand-band which I obtained from a Senior Colleague which will not be known if you talk not.

He is noughts, how can he call his ‘former’ babe to advice him on how to toast a new babe? It doesn’t make sense because knowing him, he needs no advice. Well, ’tis pretty incomprehensible; as in he amazes me every time. But then, ‘tcould be because he ‘digged’ the babe so much and didn’t want a situation where if he moved on which she has continually told him she has she comes back. Pray tell, how can such happen? Well, it did to one of his friends; and by the time they talked, his former babe hey, why you say former and not ex? Ex is not as deep said she made a childish move to have quit the relationship. Her bad luck. No, it ain’t so easy; ’tis not just the babe that lost out. The guy suffers as much pains, ‘cos he did love her then and if she had as much as come back moments before he asked his present babe out or even the little time lapse before Ms. Present said yes, he would have taken her back. The former must have given him ‘love drugs’, abi what else can explain that? On the contrary, I think he loved her. But, come why are we talking love and relationships? Abeg, let’s talk about money……….

Management called. Ha, tell me they are romancing you again? No, they know I don’t intend a move at the moment. So, what were they trying to sell you this time since they didn’t succeed in the car issue then? Don’t mind them oh, they put me on the hot seat. How? They wanted my opinion on how to make our studio you know we have two studios, a senior colleagues heads the other one more effective. Pray tell, what did you say? At that moment, I wished they had not asked. Why? I would have been silent. So, what did you tell them? While I concurred with them on the few changes they had in mind which includes changing my seating position. New position, I like not but, understand with their rational, I told them they had to disable the internet (as long as the intranet is in perfect working conditions) till like say 5.00pm. Why you suggest that? They wanted my opinion, don’t worry, ’twas not an easy call. It means I can’t blog during office hours again. I know that is one of the major things that hinder the productivity of guys. Hey, I didn’t like it but then, ’twas a call I had to make.

Come oh, how did you do it that management calls you before they make such decisions are made? Remember the same thing happened when they wanted guys to stop bringing their laptops to the office. Hmmm, that is a tough one. But, let’s say ’tis because ‘m quiet. You quiet, lailai. Wait now, amongst my friends we back-slap one another; we let our guards down. But, the people in your office are your colleagues though, you might develop friendships with some as such, you simply cannot behave as if you are amongst friends. However, another reason is that I don’t bother fighting for a lost cause. You lost me there. I’ll give you an example; I’d rather negotiate a commission rather than salary increase. Commission?, you definitely are not serious. Understand you not that as long as its salary, ’twill never be enough. Moreover, ’tis usually subject to someone’s good mood et al. So, how can you negotiate commission? Simple, you never go to the negotiation table if you cannot walk away. In essence, you must have something differs from industry to industry to offer. Hey, enough, let’s talk about something else……….

Another year runs out, ’tis been a pretty good year………………. God has simply been faithful. But then, that is who He is. He cannot be otherwise.

Pray for me oh! That what? Me, I have reached my bus-stop oh. That it works. Make the babe agree. Ehen, so me I look like a relationship prayer warrior. O mo wipe o ni ori obirin. Ori e gbe iso. You know eventually what will be, will be. If a babe likes you, she does; you cannot prove yourself.

Before I forget, the reason why I came is that I need you to raise me. Imagine, I went to the bank to check my balance and there was nothing there. If I had known I should have removed my tie. Who cares? Listen, I withdraw all my salary at once because I don’t like the bank my office uses for salary account. So, if I go there before they have paid which I doubt and there is no money there, so what? Short of which, have they not paid your salary? They kuku said ‘thas been paid, people using other banks have got theirs. Ha, maybe they deposited it in your babes account. Ehen, abi iru isokuso wo ni o n bami so yen? What is wrong if they paid your salary into your babe’s account? Abi, is it my account you want them to pay it? Or know you not that that is a better option. At least she is your babe and she will give you something. If they pay your salary into my account, kobo you won’t get.

Zion how far? ‘ssup? I dey….met her today…… she still likes me…but, it’s over. …I have finally moved on. Write me an epilogue for rethots. You want to close rethots? Of course not, about your relationship with her. Ok oooo. …send it on the morrow. Thanks. At least you have to finish your initiated story.

When you stand before a wall, HE becomes the door.

So, tell me, what do you like most about your friends? Where exactly are you going or better still what do you want to know? Unlike you, this is a very direct question; “What do you like most about your friends?”
If you think i will give you epistle, forget it. But, let me see…….how am i going to answer this question oh???

Amongst many things, i will tell you a few:
1. When their advise (let’s call it opinion) on an issue is sought, even when ‘tis not taking though ‘twas seemingly right; they never turn their backs or mock their ‘rightness’.
2. The feeling of assurance that apart from Him (who by the way, is the most important) that you have ‘fallibles’ who always have (or better still watch) your back.
3. Or can you beat this:
Wow! I have burdened you with my issues this night.
Not at all, trust me; if I was feeling burdened, I would have told you straight up.

How far, are you going for lunch? No. You? Not necessarily, but, want to take a stroll down the road. “not necessarily”, yeah right, as if you eat at all. In that case, rather than send the office assistant help me cash this cheque. Oh! That means I will have to ensure my walk gets that far, no probs sha. …just that personally I don’t like the ambiance of that bank, moreover, their wahala of confirmation of cheques is pretty inefficient.

 

Oops, no queue……gracias. Good aftern’n. Good afternoon. Your identification? Hmmm, this cheque is extinct. Sorry? This cheque is extinct. Bottomline sha, you cannot pay me. Wait oh; she said the cheque was ‘extinct’. What meant her? Oh! See this guy, what was he thinking of ….he signed ’04 rather than ’08. But then, ‘extinct’, thot dinosaurs were extinct? Encarta, Encarta where art thou.

 

That obviously is not the end of the story. What did you do to her afterwards? What is that supposed to mean? I did nothing, only, I felt pity for my colleague who would have to spend the weekend (public holiday inclusive) cashless. Ok, something tells me I was supposed to be ‘impressed’; funny enough, I was but, not positively. Can anyone ever impress you? Yes but, it won’t be for something you do consciously.

 

Educate me. The moment you do something consciously to impress another, you have simply given powers to the other. But, when ‘tis a habit……………..it may not necessarily impress people however, ‘twill differentiate you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A friend said; “we think it’s our right to sleep and wake up, we just think it’s normal.” No, ’tis not necessarily normal but, for GRACE.

Why did you do it? Do what? Get pissed off? Oh, you didn’t see what she did? No, what did she do? ‘tis bad enough I don’t fancy it them using transparent bags to pack my stuffs when I buy things here that’s another story though but, she mumbled everything into the bag. Comm’n, sebi you drove down, so, it wouldn’t have been stress for you to carry it now. Now apparently you don’t get it, ‘tis not about the stress of carrying it but, the courtesy of doing it right. But, she might not have known. Don’t worry, she knew; and that was why she was smiling while trying to hand over the bag. Of course, I refused to collect it and told her to do the right thing; she complied without much fuss though she fumed with anger but then, what is mine with that? ‘tis called customer service. Moreover, that (doing it right) is what she is been paid for.

Kai, your wahala is plenty sha. …and until we all learn and keep up with this wahala, the journey will forever seem long and probably unattainable. Don’t you get it, ‘tis high-time we stopped tolerating ineptitude from our leaders, and before you say she ain’t a leader; I shall tell you, we all are leaders in our own right. Little drops of water always make a mighty ocean.